I'm forever greatful..

Today I woke up at 6:57. I thought to myself ~UGH~ what am I doing up at this time when I could be sleeping? Then I heard the sounds outside and new it was the beginning of a new day. I heard the birds singing me awake! What a great song to wake up to (besides the song I was singing in my head. Then I remembered hearing on K-Love yesterday that Spring will be officially here tomorrow! Nice very nice! I am thinking after I get done writing I am going for a run out on the path behind my place. It’s so great to be able to have the freedoms to run, walk, workout, love, live life..

 I think about those people who are in war filled countries. I read yesterday on Jillian Michaels facebook page about a girl that when she was very small, her and her family had to run for 3 years because of war in her country. I could not even imagine 3 years of running from war, poverty, searching for a place to sleep and finding food. The girls name is Lovetta Conto and she tells of her story of the years of running, her mother dying, and how after all that running, she was rescued and given a chance to show her true potentials in life. She has chosen to help others like herself live in a safe environment. How did she do that? By using what was given to her. What has happened in her past has made an amazing impact on her future. She is making and selling jewelry to profit housing and a safe place for others to live and make something of each and every one of those she is saving. What a sacrifice she gives within herself! I believe this makes her a very strong person to be able to give this much .  This jewelry is not just any kind of jewelry, it’s made out of the shell casings laying array on the streets from which she came from. She is utilizing the war situation to help in her cause.  What an amazing life she is leading! God has blessed her with all she has had bad in her life to prosper good. That’s what He is all about!

So today when I am on my today journey, I am going to enjoy what I have and who I have in it. I am truly blessed even if my life seems rocky at times. My life is not near as bad as it could be.  Now for my run and listen to the sounds of nature and to enjoy my life..

When I stand before God at the end of my life, I would hope that I would not have a single bit of talent left, and could say, "I used everything you gave me."  ~Erma Bombeck

~~Written By Deanna Jo~~3/19/2011

My Storms

When I was growing up as a child, I used to be afraid of storms. I think it's because of the unknown of what to come. The crashing noise of thunder and the bolts of lightening terrified me. But now I have come to the realization that even though these storms can be deadly, they also can calm me. I love watching the storms roll in from my bedroom window. I love the smell, the sounds, and the beautiful thunder bolts. Oh how I love to capture them in my mind.
There are so many different ways you can learn from those storms. If you watch and listen long enough you find the storm very calm at first, then come crashing around you but I always remember, no matter how strong they may seem, there is always and to these storms. At times I will go out and stand in the storms to help me feel the rain falling all around me. I love to let the rain run down my face and help wash all my thoughts away. Makes me feel as if I have no worries, no cares, nothing.
Have you noticed after the storms that the birds starting to sing? How beautiful they sound, because they know the storm is over and the sun will soon shine. That is exactly how I feel. What a great feeling it is. No matter the outcome...

Clouds come floating into my life, no longer to carry rain or usher storm, but to add color to my sunset sky. ~Rabindranath Tagore

Written By ~Deanna Jo~~ 3/5/11

Free to Fly..

Yesterday I was driving on the highway and I saw an eagle flying above me and thought how great it would be to be that eagle. I have always thought about what they see, feeling the wind whip around them and to feel so free. They must see some beautiful sites.  

I want to be that eagle some days..

Written By ~~Deanna Jo~~ 3/4/11

Give my strength to others.

The Lord is my strength and my shield; my heart trusts in Him, and He helps me.

My heart leaps for joy, and with my song I praise Him.

Psalm 28:7

I give trust in the Lord that He understands my needs and gives me strength daily. Thank you for helping me see that it is You I trust in and sing praise to daily for you know and understand my needs.  Help me convey my thoughts and prayers to others to help them understand what is Your will for them.

Written By ~~Deanna Jo~~ 2/21/11

I'm becoming Deaf..

I was reading Voices & Choices By Karen Ehman this morning and I totally believe God was using this to help me hear this. There are many times in my life I listen to what others have said in my past which have virtually aided me to give up on goals in my life. I have learned a lot since then, but yet there have been times I have allowed those voices to come creeping back in. Why? I believe its satin trying to make me believe my worth is less than what it truly is. I am wonderfully made in the eyes of Jesus. Amazing! I could keep pushing the good thoughts away that God wants me to hear, but I choose to completely allow God to take my heart and fill it with goodness. I am going to be reminded that there are times which trouble me however I have to turn a deaf ear and remember God is on my side and not against me. I thought I would share this story which was on Karen’s page and hope she doesn’t mind me sharing it (even though I don’t think anyone reads my page anyways). It’s a good reminder when I go back and read these.

There once was a bunch of tiny frogs who arranged a climbing competition. The goal was to reach the top of a very high tower.
A big crowd had gathered around the tower to see the race and cheer on the contestants. The race began. No one in the crowd really believed the tiny frogs would reach the top of the tower.
Heard throughout the race were statements such as, “Oh, way too difficult,” “They will never make it to the top,” “Not a chance they will succeed,” and “The tower is too high.”
The tiny frogs began collapsing, one by one—except for those who, in a fresh tempo, were climbing higher and higher. The crowd continued to yell, “It is too difficult! No one will make it!”
More tiny frogs got tired and gave up. But ONE continued to climb higher and higher. This one refused to give up.
At the end of the race, all had given up climbing the tower except for the one tiny frog who, after a big effort, was the only one who reached the top!
All of the other tiny frogs wanted to know how this one frog managed to do it. They asked him how he had found the strength to succeed and reach the goal, despite the horrible odds and the cruel taunts and jeers of the crowd.
It was simple. You see, it turns out that the one determined, focused, and disciplined frog …….was utterly and completely……….DEAF!!!!


I have been struggling with my weight like a yoyo. You know I have come to the conclusion that that yoyo’s, really make my stomach queezy. And I really don’t like queezy.
Yesterday a dear friend I work with came to work on a computer issue so we went and had a “shot” of Wheat grass at Fresh Café and Market. http://www.freshcafeandmarket.com/. Yes it tastes just like grass so we used an orange to chase it down. It was actually refreshing! The woman who owns the store was so knowledgeable about health issues, I think I could have sat and talked to her all day! While we were talking to her, she said that they were celebrating 5 years of service there and so we also got a strawberry with cocoa (also very nummy)! There was fresh dried kale that came out of the dehydrator she let us try as well. I never thought good for you food would dance in my mouth as good as that food did. As I sat there I thought this is exactly what God wanted for me. Good friends, good food and a good life. So of course I can’t let God down. This is the life I am leading.
Written By ~Deanna Jo~~2/17/2011

Let Go and Let God..

I didn’t sleep much last night, I think I am catching a cold. During this time I kept hearing this.. This keeps repeating in my mind..Why… What is it telling me. So I am going to try to decipher exactly what it means to me.

Let Go and Let God..

Let my life be placed in your hands
For what is true and right is not in the land
I must put my trust where it belongs
Not into my hands, to the wrong
My arms are stretched out to you
Because God, in my heart I know it’s what I must do
No matter how hard it is for me
I want the right path as you can see
So God hold my hand, it’s going to be a rough ride
But I know letting go, you are on my side.

Written By ~~Deanna Jo~~ 2/16/2011

New Path~

God has led me on many paths in my life, none of which I ever imagined happening. Some days I want to grab a hold of those paths and try to change them in ways I know I shouldn’t. God leads me through these paths for a reason. Though I may not like some that have been made for me, I know there is a reason.
Many changes have been made in my life and I can’t tell you how pleasantly pleased I have been with all of them. My strength and self-confidence has soared to the top of any mountain I have been to. Now mind you I am not the type to brag and be arrogant about myself or what I have. I do however have to say I have come a long ways and for that I am forever grateful for people that have come into my life and reminding myself that through Christ I can do anything I set my mind to. I don’t have to have others to rely on to accomplish my goals, they only help me through my journey in life..
I am now only 4 classes (counting these 8 weeks) away from my degree in Public Administration with a minor in Emergency Management, and Psychology. Almost there, and though my time has been so crazy busy at times I cannot see myself straight, I am making it. Making it to a goal I never thought I would achieve! Many people do not understand why I continue to add more to my plate, all I can say is I have to, to accomplish my schooling, my goals I have set out for myself. This schooling is something that is on my bucket list. Not much longer and I can concentrate more on relaxing, continuing to finishing my bucket list and do what God intends me to do. No matter what the path He leads.
So you see why I have not taken the time lately to write in this silly journal of mine. Why today? Well I have felt this need to write. To express my feelings that only you, journal, will understand. You and I have gone through a lot together. You have seen parts of me, through my writings, that anyone else wonders what they are about.. My hopes, my dreams, my deepest thoughts, some of my darkest hours, and my downfalls.
Another thing I have accomplished is losing my weight that I have wanted to since like for a long time and I weigh now less than I have since OOOO before I was married. I think a lot of layers have been shed since that marriage, military wife, mommy, divorced, in-between stage, of the unknown, and now yet another single woman who is finding her way through God’s love. I have lost a total of 44 pounds and descending. The weight may be harder to lose the smaller I have gotten but it has been worth every pain staking pound. This is my second goal weight (129) I am trying for! My second! Believe it? I know, I was so excited when I did reach that first goal let alone my second? Amazing! I knew every day I was working hard and looking at my wrist band ( it says strength on it) that I would make it through, with God’s help and understanding when I wanted to just quit. I knew I couldn’t…He didn’t allow me to.. I didn’t allow myself. I kept looking at that bracelet, taking a deep breath and pushing on and enduring every moment. I knew I had a goal to reach and no one was going to stop me from reaching it. This goes the same for a lot of other goals I have reached in my lifetime. Yesterday, I met my friend Claude at Aspen to work out, and of course he didn’t see that my 10 minute run was enough so we ran all the way from Aspen Merle Hay to the apartment building I live at and back. When we got back, I finished my stomach building and arms workout. Wow talk about a big workout! On July 17th I will be walking to help support “Walk for Military Marriages“ and I will be running in August for “ Iowa Governor’s cup walk/run.
Sometimes when you least expect it God reminds me, I need to trust in the process He has for me. There are things in my life that I have no control over. I also need to remember no matter how others treat me or see me as a person that I know who I am, and know the kind of person I am. I have my random quirks, I sometimes can’t sit still (God knows I try!) and I have to remember to be kind and loving because you will never know what storms the other person is going through. We all struggle in lives, we all have points in our lives we may need help from others. I have to remember I can’t fix everything but I am there to listen, care and understand when I can and when one will allow me in. I also have to remember that even though things don’t work out the way I want them to, God has the hand in everything.
See ya later Journal… I will write back when I can. 

Written By ~~Deanna Jo~~ 7/8/2010

Changes

I have tried many times to write. I don’t know why it’s been so hard lately just to type my little heart out. So many things have changed in my life. I have never been so happy . The time away from this place has been crazy busy. I now have 5 classes left! I am on the downhill slide and so glad to see it. So many people ask why I don’t finish my masters but to be honest, I need a break from school, from everything. Just to relax.. OOO the word relaxxx when I do get that time, it’s the best thing ever. I really enjoy the time I have especially when I am spending it with Todd. Amazing difference when I am with him. I have no cares in the world, which is the best feeling ever.
I am now entering a time of goals I have made and some of those same goals I have accomplished as well. What a great feeling! I am eating healthier and yes reached a goal weight of 40 pounds.. However…. I have lost another pound ( the last time weighed at the gym) so I am going to reach another goal. I am going for another goal of 21 more pounds! Why I chose that? Not sure sounded like a great number ! I have been working out with a personal trainer 3 times a week and trying to work out on my own, though I really like it when Todd and I are working out together. Always happy to be with him working out but of course I always enjoy being with him, period.
I also have a son that is graduating this year! Amazing how the time goes by so fast. He also made Prom King  … He is a great boy. I have two awesome boys. The move Trae and I have made is one of the best things he and I have done. Scottie is staying in Madrid to finish out his high school years . Trae is enjoying taking Japanese, new friends and a new church.
So my life has been really good and even when I mess up I still ask God to help me through what I need to do to make my life go better. I know there are going to be times when I have rough patches but no matter what happens I will always know that God has a plan for me. What is the plan? Not sure but whatever it is, its for the best. I’m still working to walk where I need to walk. I know that when I have that push from God to do the right thing that it’s what I have to do no matter how the situation may look.
Well this is a night I am actually going to bed a little later than normal. WOW I know Mr. Blog.. My time for sleep was only around 2-3 hours a night.. What is happening to you! Well truth is, I need this for me. Extra sleep, eating right, relaxing when I can.. Yes its for me.. Because I have learned to love me for me.. Because I am a beautiful person inside and out. Yes I know Mr. Blog you cant believe it, but hey get used to it.. It’s about time! I’m here to shine.. No more dreary times. If I write when I am up or when I am down, it still does not change the fact that I am who I am.. I have made a lot of changes in my life and let me tell you I love it. Yes at times it’s scarey.. or maybe its not. But I have enjoyed the ride so far and will continue.

Ok Off to bed. Good night Mr. Blog. I will try to write another night.

~~Deanna Jo~~5/10/2010

New Start..

I have had a major block lately with my blogs. Not because things are going bad but I believe because they are going the way they are planned. I have decided that things need to change and I need to start new.. I really enjoy writing in this little page, not like many read it anyways, but just because I can go away just for a while and write my little bits of thoughts here and there. Boy let me tell you I have had many since 1995. Some I look back and reflect “Where is my mind?” and other s I sigh and think yes.. this is the direction I want to be heading.
Things have been hectic lately, still going to school with 9 classes left, still taking care of my boys and now I have new parts of my life. Taking care of me… I find at times, yes this is really hard for me, however I know I must if I want to move forward with my life. I have had many people come into my life ones which I truly believe want to help in this process which I am forever grateful. I think sometimes more than they realize. I think my brain over works and I don’t see how hard I am working myself when life can be a bit easier. Maybe this is the time I should see how I can make my life easier. I know there is a way and the help from a friend sure does help me see what direction will help that cause.
Today I just wanted to write to say, hey I missed this page.. I missed my writing and goodbye past.. you are dismissed. So if anyone is wondering where my stuff went.. it’s gone along with what my baggage was too. Wow what a weight that has been lifted. Oh don’t get me wrong, this has not been an easy process and all my poems are in a book at my house. I may from time to time get them out and reflect back but I will put them safely away and know that I can go on to the next chapter of my life.
Thank you little page, I have missed you. I will be back again to write my thoughts but this is for the good to let go.. and know that they are tucked away to begin a new..

Written By !~~Deanna Jo~~ 10/29/2009