New Path~

God has led me on many paths in my life, none of which I ever imagined happening. Some days I want to grab a hold of those paths and try to change them in ways I know I shouldn’t. God leads me through these paths for a reason. Though I may not like some that have been made for me, I know there is a reason.
Many changes have been made in my life and I can’t tell you how pleasantly pleased I have been with all of them. My strength and self-confidence has soared to the top of any mountain I have been to. Now mind you I am not the type to brag and be arrogant about myself or what I have. I do however have to say I have come a long ways and for that I am forever grateful for people that have come into my life and reminding myself that through Christ I can do anything I set my mind to. I don’t have to have others to rely on to accomplish my goals, they only help me through my journey in life..
I am now only 4 classes (counting these 8 weeks) away from my degree in Public Administration with a minor in Emergency Management, and Psychology. Almost there, and though my time has been so crazy busy at times I cannot see myself straight, I am making it. Making it to a goal I never thought I would achieve! Many people do not understand why I continue to add more to my plate, all I can say is I have to, to accomplish my schooling, my goals I have set out for myself. This schooling is something that is on my bucket list. Not much longer and I can concentrate more on relaxing, continuing to finishing my bucket list and do what God intends me to do. No matter what the path He leads.
So you see why I have not taken the time lately to write in this silly journal of mine. Why today? Well I have felt this need to write. To express my feelings that only you, journal, will understand. You and I have gone through a lot together. You have seen parts of me, through my writings, that anyone else wonders what they are about.. My hopes, my dreams, my deepest thoughts, some of my darkest hours, and my downfalls.
Another thing I have accomplished is losing my weight that I have wanted to since like for a long time and I weigh now less than I have since OOOO before I was married. I think a lot of layers have been shed since that marriage, military wife, mommy, divorced, in-between stage, of the unknown, and now yet another single woman who is finding her way through God’s love. I have lost a total of 44 pounds and descending. The weight may be harder to lose the smaller I have gotten but it has been worth every pain staking pound. This is my second goal weight (129) I am trying for! My second! Believe it? I know, I was so excited when I did reach that first goal let alone my second? Amazing! I knew every day I was working hard and looking at my wrist band ( it says strength on it) that I would make it through, with God’s help and understanding when I wanted to just quit. I knew I couldn’t…He didn’t allow me to.. I didn’t allow myself. I kept looking at that bracelet, taking a deep breath and pushing on and enduring every moment. I knew I had a goal to reach and no one was going to stop me from reaching it. This goes the same for a lot of other goals I have reached in my lifetime. Yesterday, I met my friend Claude at Aspen to work out, and of course he didn’t see that my 10 minute run was enough so we ran all the way from Aspen Merle Hay to the apartment building I live at and back. When we got back, I finished my stomach building and arms workout. Wow talk about a big workout! On July 17th I will be walking to help support “Walk for Military Marriages“ and I will be running in August for “ Iowa Governor’s cup walk/run.
Sometimes when you least expect it God reminds me, I need to trust in the process He has for me. There are things in my life that I have no control over. I also need to remember no matter how others treat me or see me as a person that I know who I am, and know the kind of person I am. I have my random quirks, I sometimes can’t sit still (God knows I try!) and I have to remember to be kind and loving because you will never know what storms the other person is going through. We all struggle in lives, we all have points in our lives we may need help from others. I have to remember I can’t fix everything but I am there to listen, care and understand when I can and when one will allow me in. I also have to remember that even though things don’t work out the way I want them to, God has the hand in everything.
See ya later Journal… I will write back when I can. 

Written By ~~Deanna Jo~~ 7/8/2010